Want To Make New Year Resolutions That You can Keep?

2010Do you realize that New Year’s Resolutions are the number one way to consistently set yourself up for failure? It probably starts with the fact that we can never have just one (resolution that is), there’s always two or three things that we feel need to be done or done better in the New Year.

Why is that do you think? Did you (your life, your clothes, your health, whatever) really suck that bad in the old year that you need to make a list of ten things to change right now or die trying? And sure you may get  to scratch one thing off the list, but what about the other 9?  Come to think of it – why are New Year’s Resolutions usually the same from year to year? Isn’t that kinda creepy in a Groundhog Day sorta way?

When my children were young I started Christmas shopping in January. I was able to buy presents for just about everyone (including extended family and  employees) without taking out a bank loan to pay for it all.  My strategy was simple, buy a few  presents each month – out of season and at a very low price. In December I would buy each child one “it” gift like a cabbage Patch kid or Teddy Ruxpin.

I think that we would all be more successful in our personal make0vers if we applied a similar strategy. Need to blog more? Start today, create a stockpile so that you will have posts that you can schedule well into the year. Want to quit smoking? Smoke one less cigarette every day or week  for the rest of the month, you may find that you’ve already quit by New Year’s.

Weight loss and fitness are huge and one or the other will probably appear on your resolutions list.  People often say that they need to lose the weight that they gained during the holiday season or need to get back into the fitness routine that they neglected during the holiday season. Don’t blame the holiday season for the bad habits that you let yourself fall into because it’s the holidays.  Get your fitness in when and where you can – 10 minute walk after lunch, hit the weights for 10 minutes after dinner (or do this free  boot camp workout)

Believe me, I know how  hard it i s to say “No” to all the Christmas cookies and other goodies at work and at home.  That’s why  I used  Cheat on all of my Thanksgiving food, I just sprinkled a little bit on everything and it absorbed 25% of the calories that I ingested.  For example if I ate 5000 calories then the Cheat helped me to eliminate 1250 of those calories.  A good strategy would be to enjoy all the holiday goodies and use a little Cheat when you do.

Bottom line – whatever your New Year’s resolution – to see more clearly, love more dearly, follow more nearly – don’t wait for January 1st, start now and do it day by day  to ensure success!

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Conventions Are So Darned Awesome!

Ameriplan Family Reunion 09

Ameriplan Family Reunion 09

I just got back from my company’s convention in Dallas,Texas ( is that the hottest state in the union or is there one that’s even hotter?)  and I am so pumped!  I think that recharging your entrepreneurial battery  and  reconnecting with your “people”  are two of the top reasons why we attend conventions. It most certainly isn’t  for the rest and relaxation as we stay up late into the night  and roll out of bed  early in the morning.

This year our convention was titled “Family Reunion ’09 ” and you know what?  That  is exactly what it was like, I have been to many events in the past and it really was like coming home. The faces were familiar, everyone had a smile or a hug for you, and we all had something in common didn’t we?  We are just ordinary people  taking a chance so that we can  live extraordinary lives.

The best part of convention this year was meeting all of my Facebook friends – like my sister from another mister Catey who is just the sweetest, tiniest person it will ever be my pleasure to know. I was also inspired by the young people – the under 30 crowd – who are setting goals, achieving them and setting new ones; cocktail waitresses and single Moms who have created  or are on their way to creating a monthly multiple comma income. And then there is my roomie and new BFF Waple  Michelle, who has vowed to stay on this ride with me no matter what!

What did I learn this weekend? Well I learned that I definitely chose the right company two years ago. One that has survived the economic downturn and is still  focused on helping people to save money and make money. I won’t bore you with the details, awesome though they may be (you can check it out on my website ).

I also learned that you absolutely cannot stand still, say a couple of prayers and hope that God hears you and sends abundance and prosperity your way. God hears you all the time, and  is just waiting for you to act, to move, to set your foot on that path and keep going no matter what. Life is all about the jorney, but most of us keep praying that we get air lifted to the destination.

Stop trying to hit your target and hit it already! Leave a comment and maybe tell me about your convention experience.

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How To Deal With School Bullies When Your Child is the Victim

Image taken by me on March 5, 2007.
Image via Wikipedia

I  was combing through the bathroom archives (you know that thick stack of reading material that you keep under the cabinet in the loo?) and found  a “Best Life ” magazine from 2008. There was a great article in there about how one father handled the situation when his child was being bullied. This article stirred up a lot of emotions in me, partly because I was bullied as a child and also because an 11 year old here in GA (Jaheem Herrera) hung himself as a consequence of having been the victim of bullying.

I had also noticed on Mamapedia a question from a Mom who is at her wits end because her girls are being bullied and she absolutely does not know what to do about it. So for anyone out there who’s child is a victim and also for RS in Kansas City, I  want to share

How To Deal With School Bullies When Your Child is the Victim

The first step in handling bullying is actually learning how to recognize that your child is being bullied. But it’s hard to look for some of these symptoms if no one is at home when your child comes from school every afternoon.  I was bullied because I was an immigrant, I talked funny, the other kids hated me so they beat me up every afternoon like clockwork.

My Mom was a single parent and a nurse who worked the swing shift – that’s 3Pm to 12AM. Since she was usually not home when I got home, I don’t think she ever knew what was going on.   Strive to be there for your children after school, it’s really so very important. Look for symptoms such as :

  • a sudden loss of appetite
  • or your child is ravenous when she gets home because she isn’t eating
  • your child is sleeping more than usual
  • your child is restless and can’t sleep at all
  • your child pretends to be ill to get out of going to school or looks for reasons to stay inside

How does a parent handle bullying? Isn’t this one of those things that kids should “work through”? Shouldn’t the school take care of this? I got lucky, I had my sister Penny who was fearless and put a stop to the whole bullying thing for me. But your child may only have you to help them, and help them you must, the loss of self-esteem associated with bullying can follow a child into adulthood and define the kind of person they become.

The important thing to remember is to create and leave a paper trail. in the case here in GA the school and county deny that the parents ever asked them to address the issue. Here are a few tips from that article that I read in the bathroom:

  1. Talk to your child and find out exactly what is going on, have him name the people involved.
  2. Arrange one meeting with as many school administrators present as possible: the principal, the vice principal, your child’s teacher, the guidance counselor, the dean
  3. Address the issue at the meeting, ask that they keep this person (s) away from your child. If they want to take a  “boys will be boys”  attitude then make sure to throw in words like “civil rights are being violated” and other terms that make it seem you are willing to take further (possibly legal) action.
  4. Write a letter to all parties after the meeting listing the items discussed an agreements reached.  Keep a copy of this letter, a little paper goes a long way to proving your case should this situation escalate.
  5. Contact the parents of the bully or bullies in question, let them know that some tension exists between your children and you plan to do your est to keep your child away from theirs and you would like them to do the same. Let them know that you have had a meeting with school administrators (chances are they will then call the school, which now makes this a very important issue to administrators).
  6. Follow up by writing a letter to the parents summarizing your discussion , the issue at hand, and the solutions that you both proposed. Keep copies of these letters.

The bottom line is that you cannot control other people’s children, nor do you want to be the Mom or Dad in the schoolyard tussling with a bully and embarrassing the heck out of yourself and your  child. But people can and usually will control their own kids if they feel that they have something to lose by not doing so.

How about you, have you been bullied or had to deal with bullying in your child’s life?  What solutions worked for you?

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4 Tips to Help You Keep The Faith While You’re Losing Everything Else

v2.323 and 17/366: January 17th (Gotta Have Fa...
Image by Phoney Nickle via Flickr

What I am about to tell you is not BS.  I have lived and learned. I have had to shed possessions and money  in the same way that the economy is now shedding jobs.  I have argued with the repo man,  (he won, I lost), avoided creditor phone calls (they found other ways to reach me), had the gas, electricity and cable shut off all at the same time. I stood in line at the food bank and they rejected me for Food Stamps. And through it all,  my Faith increased. I came to know that I had lived a life of excess and needed to learn some things before I could live the life I truly deserved to live.  There is a lot to say on this topic, and today , I  will focus on 4 things you need to keep in mind. In the future,  I will cover some tools that you can use to strengthen your belief system and keep the faith, even though you may be losing everything.

Figure out not WHO God is, or WHAT God is, but WHERE God is.

When I was a child growing up in Brooklyn and attending the Church of the Evangel on Hawthorne & Bedford, I asked our pastor,  Reverend Bill Nye , where God was. Reverend Nye was one of those cool pseudo-hippie pastors with a singing voice that brought many a parishioner to tears on more than one occasion; I tell you this to say that he was a preacher you could touch, he had a huge station wagon that he used to take us kids to the park, to his Dad’s parish in Greenwich, CT, to his parents beach house in Maine – anyway darned good guy, totally available to every child and adult in his parish, and probably the main reason I have not found a church home since High School. Well, back in the ’70s,  Reverend Nye told me that God is inside of me,  that I didn’t have to  find God, because God was always with me.  I did not totally understand it back then.

“There is no place where we begin and God leaves off. We can find God only within ourselves.”

In Living the Science of Mind,  author Ernest Holmes explains it further by saying that God breathes life into you leaving an imprint – kind of like your Mom’s eyebrows and your Dad’s nose. So keeping the faith requires recognition of the fact that you are one with a spirit designed for creation and not destruction. Call it God, call it the Universe, call it Infinite Intelligence, call it what you will, just recognize the connection to it that already exists within you.

“Go thy way and as thou hast believed, so be it done unto thee”,

or as Henry Ford paraphrased, “if you think you can or you think you can’t you’re probably right”. Infinite Intelligence wants only the best for you. God is all about good and creation, as opposed to destruction, and health and wealth, as opposed to sickness and lack. But here’s the thing though, because you have the power to create through your thoughts, you can actually create a nightmare life for yourself as well. I’ll give you an example, in the months before I was let go from one of my jobs, I sat around thinking all the time, “What am I going to do when they let me go?”,  so of course they let me go! My fear created that situation, and I pretty much focused on the fear of losing my job so much, that it couldn’t help but happen. That’s the enormity of the  power that you have to change your circumstances, but this power acts based on your thoughts and it doesn’t know which are bad and which are good, so it just acts on what you are focused on.  Therefore; you need to decide what you really want and think about that! Your fear short circuits your good, and when you  get out of your own way, you flip the switch that allows good to flow and complete it’s circuit.

To have and keep faith you must retain the imagination and belief of a child

I have a 6 year old grandson, and the first question he asks when he sees us bringing grocery or shopping bags into the house is, “Grandpa, what did you get me?”.  He asks this knowing that Grandpa has placed a treat or a toy in one of those bags for him, probably something he mentioned in passing within the week just past. I cannot begin to tell you the changes that have manifested in my life, (and that can be manifested in yours), through that same simple belief in my own ability to create the life I want simply by believing that if I ask, it shall eventually be given to me.

To wrap it all up, the 4 things you must know are :

  1. You are one with the Spirit and the Power which created all.
  2. To access and use this power of creation you simply have to recognize it in yourself
  3. Fear  or a weak belief system is the opposite of faith and is what sends you in the wrong direction, creating lack instead of wealth and sickness instead of health
  4. To have and keep faith you must retain the imagination and belief of a child. To access the creative power ask for what you want/need believing that you will receive it.
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