Denise Lee Porter

Has this ever happened to you? You signed a new person to your business opportunity, they were gung ho and ready to rock and roll, you are just totally over the moon about the possibilities. But it’s been two weeks and Jane doesn’t respond to your emails and has not returned any of your calls.  You’re starting to wonder if there is something you said or didn’t say that may have caused this situation.

Jane  is MIA and, trust me, it’s no one’s fault. You ASSUMED that Jane planned to just jump on in there and get to work, building her business and increasing your earnings. However, Jane’s intentions are to get to it when she get’s to it,  after all you did tell her that it’s her business.

You entered into this relationship with the intention of gaining a partner who would help you to grow your existing business, Jane entered into this business with the intention of getting a home office tax deduction because she is single, childless, and has to pay additional taxes at the end of the year.  And yes she does plan to work the business someday, but it was never her intention to do it today.

This example illustrates the negative situation that can arise when we do not clarify our true intentions when entering into a relationship. The truth is that this is a very common thread in all relationships, we have certain unspoken expectations of our co-workers, our spouses, our children, and our friends.  When the other party in a relationship does not live up to these expectations we are disappointed and the relationship is slightly fractured.

Joe, a married man from Connecticut, meets Cindy at a club in New York and they enter into a relationship. Joe’s intention is to have a good time outside of his marriage, Cindy on the other hand believes that Joe loves her and her increasing intention is to wrest hi away from his wife and children and marry him herself. Cindy wins and Joe marries her after his divorce becomes final. Several years later she is devastated to learn that he has had several affairs. Joe is surprised, it was never his intention to hurt Cindy, he gave her everything she wanted and assumed that she understood “the kind of guy” that he is.  Joe and Cindy could have saved themselves some trouble nd heartache by stating their intentions and expectations loudly and clearly back at the club when they first met.

In business, as in life, you will find that things will go much more smoothly when everyone is clear about what their intentions are and what their desired outcome is. What if you had said to Jane, “I am looking for people who are ready to hit the ground running because I have a goal..” then Jane could have responded “Well I really like the business model and want to sign on, but I probably won’t be able to get started working for another six months, would that be ok with you?”

It sure would save you a lot of angst and frustration to find out what’s really in your prospect’s head up front, now wouldn’t it?

How do you communicate your intentions when prospecting?